Tonight I spent some time with a family that I met a short seven years ago.  I sat at the same dining room table in their home in which we planned their son’s funeral.  Seven years ago, I watched a mother stare blankly at a baked potato that her family was trying to get her to eat, barely able to concentrate on the arrangements we were discussing.  Seven years ago, his sister was so angered by the tragic circumstances of his death that those emotions were carried out onto me.  …

A little over a year ago, a friendship that was very dear to me came to an end. I had loved this person dearly and enjoyed the time I spent with this friend. We experienced some tremendous highs and struggled through some painful lows. We invested a lot of time, energy into our friendship. So, when our friendship was hit by a fatal blow of circumstances, the loss almost felt like a death. I turned from the path of friendship to the path of grief. To this day I still …

Most of you know that I have HUGE fear of flying!  I don’t like balloons.  Elevators freak me out.  Flying terrifies me.  It’s kind of funny to write that out because I fly all over this country, and I fly almost monthly and yet each time I board the plane I have to talk myself onto the jetway.
(Over Phoenix)
I used to love to fly!  Any chance that I could get, I would fly.  I had to fly to Utah in order to meet my future husband (of course I didn’t …

I’ve been to a lot of camps.  I grew up going to outdoor ed. camp, horse camp, church camp, and all kinds of in between camp.  I love, love, love camp!  In the summer of 2000 I had heard about a burn camp outside of San Antonio and I knew right away that I wanted to go and be a camp counselor.  I was so excited when I heard back from the camp that they wanted me also and they wanted me to be their camp chaplain.  So off I …

I have been wanting to write a post for a while now about the work that I do, the work that I do with the families of the fallen.  I have received emails asking about details, wondering about the obscurity in some of the posts that I have written after I have come back from a detail.  I have pondered the words that I would write, pinching them and molding them into some sort of shape that would do justice and give honor to the names that I know too …

I plan funerals for fallen firefighters.  I can’t explain my job much simpler than that.  I have never planned the funeral for a police officer but the job is similar.    After learning about the 4 Oakland police officers that were tragically killed last week, I was curious as to how the OPD would handle such an event.  One or two funerals are hard enough to orchestrate but four, it just makes me shake my head and sigh.  I saw this video today and was so proud of how these officers …

When an individual or family experiences a life changing event, the first thing a friend wants to do is provide a meal.  There is something about a hot casserole that seems to have the word ‘help’ written all over it.  Maybe that’s where the term ‘comfort food’ came from.
During the first few days after a death, the family is usually inundated with take-out food, home-made dishes, junk food, and sodas.  I can’t tell you how many times I have walked into the over-flowing kitchens of grieving people to find …

Yesterday I was talking on the phone with one of the families who lost their son in that tragic fire training incident in Kilgore, TX.  Part of my job is to help them get on a road of recovery and healing and tohelp them find a ‘ new normal’ in their lives.   There are many facets to this, I will save for a different post, but we happened to be talking about what helped her during those hours and days after her son’s death.   She simply said, ‘a book of …

Photo by Batega
I have a dear friend, who is young mother, that just finished up her treatment for breast cancer.  On the same day she celebrated that milestone, the wife of another friend was diagnosed.  I just couldn’t believe the irony in the news and just shook my head in sadness and disbelief.  Not another one.  Not another young woman having to battle such a nasty disease.
Thinking about both of my friends and the long journey that one has completed and the other is now starting got me to thinking …